You can have your excuses or you can have success; you cannot have both.”
- Jen Sincero
Man, doesn’t that just hit right where it hurts?
As a chronic Excuse Maker for my first 3 decades, I felt like I was being read to filth when I heard this quote for the first time.
I have seen it throughout my practice as well.
When I meet a potential client for the first time, I can usually tell within minutes if they are an Obstacle Overcomer or an Excuse Maker.
And I have learned that when someone is extremely attached to their excuses, meeting their goals becomes an almost impossible task, which totally blows.
So, if you feel like you may be prone to making excuses, read on to find out what needs to shift for you to show up as your Totally Awesome, Bad@ss self!
What is an Excuse Maker?
The textbook Excuse Maker is identified with problems rather than solutions.
So, for every solution that is suggested, they will fire back with all the reasons why it won’t work for them.
In a way, this is kind of impressive; it shows perseverance and tenacity!
And it actually requires quite a bit of energy to poke holes in solution after solution.
If we could only reverse the direction of that energy from being problem-focused to solution-focused, we would see rapid transformation in their lives.
What is an Obstacle Overcomer?
An Obstacle Overcomer is a solution-focused person who changes the question from, “How is this impossible for me?” to “How can I make this possible for me?”
They also have another hallmark sign: they take friggin’ responsibility.
Even though “responsibility” may not seem like the sexiest word in the English language, it kinda is.
As we’ve talked about before, we empower ourselves to be in charge of our own lives and circumstances when we take responsibility for our personal experience.
And what’s sexier than that?!
Becoming an Obstacle Overcomer
To adopt this shiny, sexy new mindset, you’ll want to first take a peek at your goals.
The second thing you’re gonna wanna do is figure out the big picture of what it is you actually want: what does success look like for you?
Third, scan the horizon for obstacles.
This is different than looking for excuses!
Scanning for obstacles is actually key because it protects us from being blindsided later on by legitimate kinks in our plan.
Fourth, for every reason you come up with that could get in the way of reaching a goal, come up with 3 pieces of evidence to prove that reason is bullsh$t.
Example: “I want to do yoga three times a week, but taking time away from my kid makes me feel like a bad mom.”
Reasons that’s absolute bull: 1) “I am a better mom when I practice self care,” 2) “by taking time to be kind to myself, I am leading by example and teaching my daughter it’s important to prioritize yourself,” and 3) “I can do yoga WITH my daughter and make it into something enjoyable for both of us.”
What we focus on, we create more of.
So, by training our brains to look for solutions rather than excuses, we become unstoppable.
Even if you just use this as a mental exercise to decrease resistance to taking action, you will find yourself rewiring your brain on a cellular level and showing up with ease to tackle your goals in no time.
Go forth and kick butt, you Obstacle Overcomer!
