How to Reprogram “I’m Not Good Enough”

Throughout life, we stumble upon situations that cause wounds within us.

These wounds are particularly formative in childhood when we’re the most susceptible to being programmed by our surroundings.

Hurtful behaviors or actions are often repeated unknowingly by our imperfect caregivers until they form what’s called a core wound.

At the end of the day, a core wound is just a limiting belief, but it’s usually a banger of a limiting belief and is entrenched in our identity.

Example: “I have to work really hard to get what I want” (limiting belief) versus “I am unlovable” (core wound).

Is This the Right Core Wound for You to Reprogram?

“I’m not good enough” is the most common core wound by far, affecting over half the population!

Let’s do a quick audit to make sure it will benefit you to reprogram it.

People with an “I’m not good enough” core wound will often:

• Talk about what they should do or should have done
• Compare themselves to others
• Put others on a pedestal
• Put themselves down
• Feel like they can’t keep up with others
• Overwork themselves
• Try too hard OR not try at all to avoid feeling like a failure
• Have a great deal of trouble giving themselves credit for their wins
  
  

If this sounds like you, let’s reprogram this sucker together!

Reprogramming Steps

Now that we know our core wound/limiting belief (step 1), we’re gonna turn it on its head and reprogram the opposite belief (step 2).

So, here is your task: once a day for at least 3 weeks, finish the sentence starter, “I was good enough when:” 10-15 times.

Type it up, write it down, or even record your voice as you go through it.

Here is an example of the types of things your list could include, though it can be anything that floats your boat!

I was good enough when:

1. I fed my pet this morning

2. I encouraged my coworker last week

3. I got up this morning after only hitting the snooze button once

4. I ate a nutritious snack yesterday

5. I did my laundry two days ago

6. I did the dishes last night

7. I was understanding to my friend when she had to cancel our hangout last minute

8. I did my grocery shopping after work today instead of putting it off

9. I was kind to the checkout person

10. I meditated this morning

There are a few considerations to note while reprogramming “I am not good enough:”

Be specific. We want each memory to be specific so that it elicits the imagery and emotion that reprogram the subconscious mind.

Be consistent. It’s really important to try to do this every day. It shouldn’t take more than about 10 minutes the first time and as you practice, it will become an even faster process.

Go easy on yourself. The whole point of this practice is to show your brain the opposite of what it’s been trained to look for. That last thing we want to do is trigger your “I am not good enough” core wound in the midst of reprogramming it! So, be kind to yourself.

Pay attention to how you feel. If you get an image and feel a positive emotional response from each memory, you are doing it right.

After a couple weeks of daily practice, here are some of the results you can expect:

• Your brain will easily create space for feeling good enough instead of only looking for times you felt subpar
• You’ll be more confident and emotionally regulated
• You’ll start seeing new opportunities in your life you didn’t notice before
• You won’t compare yourself to others NEARLY as much
• You’ll be able to better celebrate your own wins and the wins of others
  
  

I believe with all my heart you are good enough, and I hope this will help you believe it, too!

A special thanks to Thais Gibson and her work in Integrative Attachment Theory for being the inspiration for this post!